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My number one video on Youtube? It’s After the hysterectomy – Sex. What to expect followed by After The Hysterectomy What To Expect Weight Loss. If you’ve been with me any time at all, you know there is no subject I won’t tackle including sex. So why all the conversation surrounding sex after a hysterectomy? Let’s dig in.
I have talked to hundreds of women both before and after their hysterectomies. The main reason women ask me about sex after their hysterectomy is that they can’t find answers elsewhere. Exactly what I encountered before my hysterectomy.
Matter of fact, my doctor, a woman, didn’t discuss anything about sex with regards to having a hysterectomy. Nothing. We talked about the procedure. What would happen afterwards as far as healing and taking time to recuperate. But the only thing she said was don’t have sex too soon because you will rupture your stitches. Um that’s a visual isn’t it? Scared me for sure.
Before we begin, remember this is from my experience. That’s all I can talk about – my experiences. So let’s get started.
Again back to the time frame after my hysterectomy mentioned above. I believe my doctor told me no sex for six weeks. Add to that the visual she put in my head of sutures rupturing and having to go back under to be restitched up, and I wasn’t going to chance it.
So now it’s after the six week timeframe and I’m cleared for sex. First off the thought of having sex wasn’t the first thing I was thinking of at the six week mark. For me, my husband and I have always had a wonderful relationship and there was never any pressure to do anything before I was ready – both physically and mentally.
Unfortunately, many women who have written to me have felt pressured by their significant others. I’m a girl’s girl and I always say stand up for yourself and your body. If you’re not ready, you tell him you’re not ready. Period.
If however, you are ready mentally but not physically, there are other ways to satisfy your partner without the danger of intercourse too soon. Go those routes until you’re fully ready physically.
When the day has arrived that you are ready to try, I recommend foreplay and lubricant. Remember in addition to the hysterectomy you haven’t had sex in at least 6 weeks. Maybe longer. Things will feel tight and possibly uncomfortable. Both foreplay and lubricant will help with that.
My first time after the hysterectomy wasn’t all the great. To be honest, I was ready for it to be over. But flash forward 6 years now since my hysterectomy, and our sex life is as good as it ever was. Yes it’s different. I do not have a cervix but because it’s different doesn’t mean it’s not good.
Ready? Remember now it’s about you. You need to take control of this first experience after your hysterectomy. If you need more foreplay, tell your partner. More lubricant? Get it. Slow down and think back to when you enjoyed having sex and what you did to get there. Take your time.
And if like me, your first time isn’t that great? Keep trying. It will get better. This I promise you. It did for me.
Struggling with weight gain? This may help you: Has my hysterectomy stopped me from losing weight?